Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Snack Time!

Saturday, 10/24

Home: Home is perhaps the most aptly-named apartment gallery in Chicago; every time I visit (okay, this was my second time) I have felt like I was being welcomed into the abode of a dear friend, albeit one I just met. The snacks here truly transcend the best-case expectation of gallery nibbles, and are a real cornucopia. I can't possibly hope to remember everything, there was so much, but Steph took a picture!

Reviewing the picture, I remember now: they had freakin' EDAMAME! Who has edamame at an art opening? Home Gallery, that's who! Best gallery snack EVER! (Except for that one time Aron Packer ordered pizza, which was a crazy one-time fluke that I still don't understand. And this time I had steak tartar at an opening in Baltimore, which is even less explicable.) Three types of cheese, and crackers to carry the cheese! All of them good! Two awesome hard cheeses, maybe Parmesan and/or Romano and/or something else, plus crazy freakin' soft cheese...was it chevre? Bri bri, you want chevre? Lover?

Olives, grapes, and apples! I was like a Roman Emperor! Hey wait, I see a fourth cheese in the picture! I think that's brie. I don't remember that one. And in the distance I think those are blue corn chips and salsa. I think I ate some but I honestly don't remember, there was so much. (Steph enjoyed the blue corn chips, they are all she ate here.)

Home Gallery, for the second time now, you have truly blown me away with your delicious snacks. I wish I had more time to stay and enjoy your snacks, and just hang out. I also wish I hadn't just eaten an Italian sandwich from Potbelly; I would have skipped dinner if I'd known your snacks were going to be so awesome. As it was I had a bunch anyway and got my bloat on.

secondBEDROOM and Medicine Cabinet: The kitchen table had a paper sign on it, reading "BEER," with an arrow pointed at the fridge. The clear invitation to take beer from the fridge was greatly appreciated. There were several choices; we opted for the Miller High Life because the case was already open and it came in a camo can, though not the Realtree-type we enjoyed on our Busch at Knob Creek. Thanks for the beer!

Barbara and Barbara: AWESOME SNACKS! There were two basic zones of snack distribution here. We hit the back room first, where wine was served (sadly I abstained as I was driving, but Steph enjoyed a glass of red; they put her name on her cup so as to avoid waste and confustion). The back room also featured chips, guacamole, salsa, crackers and if I remember correctly, hummus. There was definitely hummus in the front room, both roasted red pepper and plain I think, as well as FREAKIN MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP CUPCAKES!!! HOLY CRAP!!! These were awesome, and Steph was an even bigger fan of them than I was! Thanks for all the snacks, B&B! You do really love us!

MVSEVM: I saw people drinking beers, but it was pretty packed back towards the kitchen from where they might have been getting them (and where there might have been snacks), so although I attended this gallery, I have to rate its snack time performance as a total mystery.

Sunday, 10/25

Sunday, Stephanie and I went to the West Carrol Studio Building, where our good friend Annie Heckman had invited us to show our work in the hallway outside her studio. There were lots of snacks! Also, I showed this painting.

Annie had a veggie tray with dip, Halloween Oreos that were "immediately consumed" (Steph's phrase, I didn't even see 'em), chips, the "big two" types of hummus (again, roasted red pepper and regular), wasabi peas, honey roasted peanuts, and probably a bunch of other stuff I don't remember. Later, Dan Godston showed up with dried apricots and pineapple, chocolate, and maybe some other stuff. The other studios had lots of great snacks, too! There were Sun Chips and other chips and guac and so on.

Katrina Chamberlin had a pretty amazing spread, including cheesecake! Man, I love cheesecake so much! Somehow I resisted the temptation to plow face-first into the dish and eat the whole thing right in front of everyone without even using my hands. In fact, I somehow avoided having any of it at all, which let me tell you, I'm not sure why that happened. Was it the big, heavy glass lid over the dish? Was it the blessing I saw her performing while serving that, that made me reluctant to just dig in? I'm not sure. Katrina, why didn't I eat your cheesecake?

According to our host, Annie Heckman, the landlord had requested that no alcohol be served to visitors. Let me state, for the record, that Annie conscientiously obeyed this edict. The response to this policy by others present, however, reminded me of the following passage from Special Warfare, Special Weapons, by Kevin Dockery:

"As we were getting down into the firing position, the [Marine] Lieutenant sounded off. 'There will be no automatic fire on this range,' he said. 'Everything will be semiautomatic fire only.' That was a big of a mistake on his part.

'Lock and load one magazine. Ready on the left? Ready on the right? Ready on the firing line! Shooters, you may commence fire!' We all just raised our heads a little bit and looked up and down at each other. At the command 'Commence fire' all of us switched over to automatic and let that magazine rip. The Lieutenant immediately confiscated all of the weapons and threw us off the base."

When the West Carroll Studio Building open studios closed at 7:00, Steph and I followed Dan Godston over to his place at the Switching Station Artist's Lofts, so I could pick up a piece I'd left with him for the Synesthetic Plan of Chicago. We got there and some guy yelled, "Hey Dan, come get something to eat!" Dan invited us to join him, and so after I picked up my piece, we heaped up paper plates with chicken stir-fry, spaghetti and meatballs, salad, chips, and dip. (There was also something like peach pie with whipped topping, but man, I made the classic mistake of gorging myself and not leaving room for dessert!) So that's how the night ended, with me stuffing my face full of meatballs etc. while Dan gave us a tour of the building. Thanks, Dan!

Man, there are a lot of great snacks out there. And there's a lot of great art, too. So get out there, get your drunk on (but please, not if you're driving!), and get yourself some snacks. And see some art! It's good for you!

This is Jeriah, last surviving officer of the Nostromo, signing off.

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